Tag: flowers

Dear Ravi,

As reported earlier, the world is not making very much sense. Maybe I should be more specific. The leader of our country and his henchmen and women seem incapable of making any good decisions. Over the weekend our country started a war in Iran that no one wanted. This is not a “holy war”. This is not divine retribution. This is the slaughtering of innocents. When you died, an entire church full of people grieved. Magnify that grief by 167 little girls who never got to return home from school on Saturday. The grief of their families assails the heavens. Jesus did not tell us to take up arms in His name. Jesus was the Prince of Peace. None of this makes any sense. So, where do we find solace?

I find solace in walking the dogs on a day when it was warm enough to wear a T shirt without a jacket. I find solace in the fact that the days are growing longer, and the temperatures are not so frigid. I am waiting for the 50 crocuses that Laurie and I planted in the front yard to push through the earth. I laughed yesterday when I was walking the dogs across campus and Raya found an entirely uneaten piece of pepperoni pizza. Score! She scooped it up and carried it in her mouth, dancing up the block in glee. After a bit she stopped and gobbled the entire slice, sharing none of it with a disappointed Jack Jack. These are the things that make me smile.

Shortly after you left us our dear friend April sent me an amaryllis bulb. It was just a little bulb, wrapped in some leaves and dirt. I planted it in a pot and waited. Eventually, some green shoots came forth. Over the course of the winter it grew and grew. In the spring it put forth a beautiful red bloom. The bloom eventually faded, but the shoots of the plant seemed determined to take over the dining room table. When warm weather was truly here I replanted it in my garden where it spent the summer going nuts and growing like crazy. I did not want to leave it to over winter outside, so I brought it in. Gradually, it just shrunk down to the bulb and spent the winter hibernating. Today I noticed that it was putting forth more green shoots! Spring is coming. Resurrection is coming. This brave little bulb has given me so much hope. It reminds me of you. You grew, you were beautiful, and you were deeply loved. I see you in my amaryllis and the cardinals. You are a beautiful harbinger of hope.

So, my son, I commission you to continue to be a harbinger of hope, not just for me, but for an entire world that is in pain. For the parents and families who have lost loved ones in a senseless war. To those who were disappeared by ICE. To those who are afraid to leave their homes. Ravi, be their ray of hope. You and I are peacemakers. Daddy is a peacemaker. I don’t think this work ends when we leave this earth. I think this work becomes even more important. You were born to love and to be loved. As I go forth in this world, I carry your memory and I try to show love to my fellow humans and animals. It seems the least that I can do. I miss you deeply, but I believe you are called to do great things. Join our prayer in asking God not for retribution but for peace. For joy, not sorrow. Together Ravi, we can do this. Together. Love you to the moon and back. Mom.