Hugs?

Boo is continuing to astonish me. He has started tapping into not only his emotions, but mine as well. Since Max has passed and Mouse has gone off to college, he has been saying he is sad. He will tell me he is happy about a trip to Taco Bell, but then will also tell me he is sad. We FaceTimed with Mouse last night and he said that made him happy. Today he really surprised me. We were in the car, and he was chatting with Sam, not saying anything too important. Suddenly, he said, “You need a hug.” I looked at him. He looked at me. I said, “You are right. I do need a hug!” The miracle did not stop there, he leaned over and gave me a hug. For the next few blocks that I drove he kept a hand on my arm, patting me as if to say, “It will be okay”. I am floored by all of this. Boo has never offered anyone a hug. Boo does not usually like to hug! One of the things I struggle with as an autistic woman is being in touch with my feelings and really knowing how I feel. What I struggle with even more is knowing what other people might be feeling. I have a terrible time reading facial expressions or emotions. In this case, Boo is light years ahead of me. He able to tell me is he is happy, sad, uncomfortable, etc. He is also able to pick up on my emotions and know when I need a hug or some human contact.

I have known I am autistic for 5 years. Emotions still baffle me, mine or those of anyone else. I have worked long and hard on this in therapy. Boo has only really been able to speak in the last year or so, yet he is keying off of his emotions and those of others and expressing them. This reinforces the fact that if you know one autistic, you know one autistic. We all are different. We all have varying strengths and weaknesses. I am so excited as Boo moves into this new school year without the brain fog that his Topomax caused. He is alert, interactive, and a heck of a lot of fun! He is also gaining an appetite and some body mass. I want his teachers to see the miracles that I am seeing. I have had the best time this summer doing things with him. He loves to ride his bike or go for long walks. He loves rides in the car. Being curled up on the couch in a pile of dogs is his happy place. He has a keen sense of the absurd and loves to laugh. It will be bittersweet for me when he hops on the bus Tuesday morning, leaving me for other adventures. Go forth, Boo, and conquer the world. Mom loves you.

Author: snort262

I am a wife, mom, long distance runner and fierce autism advocate. My background is in education. Currently, I am a nanny, a tutor, and an autism consultant.

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