Dear Ravi,
Sorry for not checking in lately, my muse seems to have gone missing. I had a really tough therapy session last week and went into complete autistic shutdown and haven’t been able to blog or journal since. I think Kathy, my therapist, was really frustrated with me because I simply could not speak. Maybe this gave me a taste of what it was like for you. I had thoughts in my head, but I could not nail them down. I could not express what I was feeling or what I needed. In short, it was a bust of a therapy session, and I am still feeling the repercussions of it 8 days later. I meet with Kathy again today, honestly, I am not looking forward to it. I have a hard time identifying emotions as it is, and when I feel pushed or shamed, I clam up.
It has been a tough week. We lost Gloria Steinem, an icon among feminist figures. She never did get to see the ERA written into law. I remember hearing about that in the 1970s and Anabel mocked me for wanting equal rights for women. She said that would mean I would have to be drafted and go into war. Did I want to get shot, she asked. Looking back on it, the draft wasn’t even a thing when I was in elementary school, and even at that young age I knew I was a pacifist and would ask for an exemption. Anyway, I didn’t bother to argue back because even at that age I knew it was not worth it. Anabel has some very strange ideas, and they usually do not hold up in the light of day. No worries, you never have to deal with her again, and neither do I. So, you have Dolly Parton, Timy Curry, and Gloria Steinem in heaven with you and those of us on earth are poorer for it.
Please continue to pray for your Uncle Rob and Aunt Cindy. Rob is back in the ICU with another brain bleed and his hemoglobin is 6.5. As you well know, this is dangerously low. The lesions are taking over his brain. He still wants to fight the cancer, but his doctors are saying that he has reached the end of treatment options. He was at home for about 2 weeks, but Cindy was the sole caregiver and she is exhausted. Please pray for a peaceful resolution for both of them. I just sent out a care package to your cousins Robbie and Aaron. It should arrive on Thursday. I just want them to know that someone is thinking about them and sending all their love. I have the distinct feeling that we are about to go back to Indiana, I am just not certain when. If and when Cindy needs us, we will hop in the car and start driving.
Beginning this fall, Daddy and I will both be tutoring and I am helping teach Sunday School. We will also both be involved in the Gather Program, making autism and sensory friendly church services available at St. Clement’s for those who would like such a thing. I am very excited. I wish that you and Mercury could have benefited from such a thing.
Anyway, it is 4:30 in the morning and I am loose ends. It was raining earlier, which is a huge relief, but the pets do not like the thunder. Nikki is under the bed. Raya and Jack Jack are at my feet. Gloria is sitting in the chair next to me. It is a peaceful scene. One of my African violets just put up a new bloom. Your crabapple tree in the backyard is about ready to harvest. The cherry tree looks green and healthy. I ordered flowers in your memory for church on October 11, the day that we lost you. That same day we plan to put a bird feeder in the front yard and hopefully attract lots of cardinals and other feathered friends. I will check back with you soon. I love you forever. Mom.
Harriet's Hedgehogs and Autism Advocacy 