Tag: garden

Shoots of green

Dear Ravi,

As reported earlier, the world is not making very much sense. Maybe I should be more specific. The leader of our country and his henchmen and women seem incapable of making any good decisions. Over the weekend our country started a war in Iran that no one wanted. This is not a “holy war”. This is not divine retribution. This is the slaughtering of innocents. When you died, an entire church full of people grieved. Magnify that grief by 167 little girls who never got to return home from school on Saturday. The grief of their families assails the heavens. Jesus did not tell us to take up arms in His name. Jesus was the Prince of Peace. None of this makes any sense. So, where do we find solace?

I find solace in walking the dogs on a day when it was warm enough to wear a T shirt without a jacket. I find solace in the fact that the days are growing longer, and the temperatures are not so frigid. I am waiting for the 50 crocuses that Laurie and I planted in the front yard to push through the earth. I laughed yesterday when I was walking the dogs across campus and Raya found an entirely uneaten piece of pepperoni pizza. Score! She scooped it up and carried it in her mouth, dancing up the block in glee. After a bit she stopped and gobbled the entire slice, sharing none of it with a disappointed Jack Jack. These are the things that make me smile.

Shortly after you left us our dear friend April sent me an amaryllis bulb. It was just a little bulb, wrapped in some leaves and dirt. I planted it in a pot and waited. Eventually, some green shoots came forth. Over the course of the winter it grew and grew. In the spring it put forth a beautiful red bloom. The bloom eventually faded, but the shoots of the plant seemed determined to take over the dining room table. When warm weather was truly here I replanted it in my garden where it spent the summer going nuts and growing like crazy. I did not want to leave it to over winter outside, so I brought it in. Gradually, it just shrunk down to the bulb and spent the winter hibernating. Today I noticed that it was putting forth more green shoots! Spring is coming. Resurrection is coming. This brave little bulb has given me so much hope. It reminds me of you. You grew, you were beautiful, and you were deeply loved. I see you in my amaryllis and the cardinals. You are a beautiful harbinger of hope.

So, my son, I commission you to continue to be a harbinger of hope, not just for me, but for an entire world that is in pain. For the parents and families who have lost loved ones in a senseless war. To those who were disappeared by ICE. To those who are afraid to leave their homes. Ravi, be their ray of hope. You and I are peacemakers. Daddy is a peacemaker. I don’t think this work ends when we leave this earth. I think this work becomes even more important. You were born to love and to be loved. As I go forth in this world, I carry your memory and I try to show love to my fellow humans and animals. It seems the least that I can do. I miss you deeply, but I believe you are called to do great things. Join our prayer in asking God not for retribution but for peace. For joy, not sorrow. Together Ravi, we can do this. Together. Love you to the moon and back. Mom.

Two Trees

Dear Ravi,

Does time in heaven look and feel the same way as time on earth? I seriously doubt it. Scripture says that a day in heaven is like a thousand years. I believe that God operates outside of the confines of time. It has been nearly a year since you left us. Your daddy and I want to do something to commemorate your passing and decided that planting a tree in the backyard felt like the right thing to do. Roberta told us that Gerten’s was a great place to find a tree, so we spent several evenings perusing their website. Our choices came down to two trees. One was a north star cherry; the other was a flowering crab apple. Do you remember the crab apple we had in the backyard when you were little? I miss that tree. Yesterday, we went to Gerten’s and wandered all around. I had no idea that the nursery was so big. There were literally acres of trees, plants, vines, herbs, etc. It smelled heavenly. A nice lady named Emma helped us find both the crab apple and cherry trees. The crab apple tree that caught my eye was called prairie fire and the pictures showed beautiful vibrant blossoms. The cherry tree was said to produce pie cherries. Both are pollinator friendly and attract birds. We could not make up our minds, so we decided to purchase both! I picked out a crab apple which spoke to me and daddy picked out a cherry tree which spoke to him. We also bought a bag of fertilizer that guarantees the life of the tree for 5 years and encourages healthy root growth. For a fee, Gerten’s will also deliver and plant the trees that one purchases. We decided to do this as well. I am not certain I can dig deep enough to make the entire root bulb happy, and I want to give these trees the best possible shot at life that I can give. The trees will be delivered and planted on Monday October 13, 2 days after the anniversary of your passing.

Before your daddy and I went to the nursery Laurie came over and we planted 50 crocus bulbs in a spiral shape in the front yard. Daddy dug two eight-inch-deep trenches in the side yard, and I planted more crocus, some hyacinth bulbs, and some tulips. Now I will have something pretty to look at when spring arrives. The bulbs should come up before the grass does. It was 87 F in the shade yesterday, so I worked in fits and starts. I hauled lots of wood chips from the pile in the driveway over where I had planted the bulbs and spread it all around. The yard still looks like a bit of a jungle, but little by little I am making progress.

After Daddy and I had purchased your trees we were wandering out of the nursery. An orange monarch swooped by our heads. I am certain that it was you checking in and approving of the trees we will plant in your honor.

Ravi, we miss you more than words can express. I have been dreading this month and this coming week. We are grateful for the friends who walk this path with us. Tomorrow, there is an outdoor blessing of the animals at St. Clement’s. I am taking Jack Jack. He is our only truly sociable dog. Gloria would tell Joy how to run the service and herd all the other pets into a tight pack. Raya would simply faint from sheer terror. So, that leaves Jack Jack who will do anything for a good belly rub. I hope that you will stop by the service. It will be the type of controlled chaos that you love. We are excited for the trees to arrive in 9 days. We will think of you every time we look at them. Love you to the moon and back. Mom